I
used to re-read all of ex relationship's texts.
I read them in a state of disbelief. I hurt each time I read it. I forwarded them to others. I told my friends about them. They were the
weekly soap opera of entertainment for my soul circle. Why? What was the purpose?
Why do this to myself?
When
I answered this question, I said that I needed social support. “It is healthy for me to talk
about this. Wow, isn’t it amazing that she still is this crazy… that she still
spends so much time and energy trying to tear me down after 5 years? Can you
believe this?”
But
when I got real with myself, and I had moments of Grace, I realized that the
better question was “Why do I keep the story going?”
Why? I
wanted to continue the story of being a victim. I saw myself as damaged. I was the broken-winged bird.
And,
with these thoughts I manifested so many experiences to remind me that I was
broken. I found a healer to
nurture me back to health with soups and candles. I sought friendships from those who wanted to steer me and
‘take care’ of me. And, they
did. I enjoyed the best
soups. I had so many loving friends give wonderful care to me. I was nurtured.
My
reward: I got to continue to be miserable. Nurtured, well-loved, and miserable. Because at the end of the day, 'victim' thinking is not empowering - it is miserable.
Our
thoughts create our experiences.
We manifest the mirror of our self concept. We become our self talk and our self story.
Our
beliefs reflect back to us again and again and again as experiences and
relationships until we know that we are creating what we see and what we
experience.
We have to learn this lesson. The only way to learn the lesson is through trial and
error and trial again.
The
cycle is a closed loop. It
reinforces itself. You have
a belief. You attract
experiences based on this belief.
The belief is reinforced.
Our belief becomes truth and truth is reinforced over and over
again.
Until
it doesn’t. Until one
day you wake up and see your own image. You see your reflection.
Seeing
your own image is enlightenment.
Enlightenment
is not eternal bliss. It is not
euphoria. It is not a place
out-of-time or ever-after. It
is not a place outside of this world or outside of you. It exists right now and within you. It exists as an “aha,” or “oh, that’s
what I have been believing?” moment.
It is the knowing that that you are the thinker and that your world will
be what you believe it to be.
The
real truth? There is a tiny rope
holding your leg. It has
been there since you were young.
It is twined in the fabric of your beliefs and your experiences. But, you are an elephant. And, at any moment, you can
choose to simply move… to break free of this bond. This rope cannot hold your strength if you choose to snap
the bond.
You
are what you believe yourself to be.
You are your thought
habits. Change your thought habits and change your life!
Practice:
Presence
is so important. When you
are present, you are not a victim to your story. You are creating your experiences in the endless
potential of “the now.”
The
best tool for presence is your breath.
Therefore, today the practice will focus on breath work and identifying a
victim belief that you hold.
Time:
15 minutes
- In a moment (after reading this), close your eyes.
- Breathe in and out for 5 minutes (focus on keeping your inhale and exhale the same count)
- Picture yourself in the mirror. Do not analyze or critique yourself. The image in the mirror is your soul image and is perfect. You are going to ask your soul image three questions. The soul image ALWAYS knows the answers to your questions.
- Pause. Breathe in. Breathe out. Ask your first question: “What is a belief I hold about myself that is holding me back?” Wait on the answer. It will usually come quickly and can be recognized by your immediate thoughts.
- Next question: “How is this belief serving me?” Wait on the answer.
- FInal question: “Why do I keep it?” Wait on the answer.
- Breathe in and out for 5 minutes (focusing on keeping your inhale and exhale the same)
- Write about what you experienced and how you could apply a new practice/habit in your life supporting a more empowering belief about yourself (to replace the old belief).
Love
to all. Namaste.
Ryan
Dr. Ryan Pride is the owner of the Moksha Institute, a firm dedicated to improving the wellbeing of individuals, teams, and organizations through culture transformation and leadership development. A profit-for-purpose company, the Moksha Institute applies Ancient Teachings for the Modern Time in order to transform striving into thriving.
For more information, please go to: www.mokshainstitute.com